A Mouthful of Air

May 12, 2003
Lean, minutely detailed and frighteningly convincing, this polished debut explores the mind of Julie Davis, a privileged 26-year-old New Yorker suffering from postpartum depression after giving birth to her son, Teddy. The novel begins just after she tries to commit suicide, soon before Teddy's first birthday. Back from the hospital and home with her husband, Ethan, and Teddy's live-in nurse, Georgie, Julie struggles to feign normality, continually reassuring herself that she can function perfectly well: "She will empty the stroller and pay for what she has. She will tell Ethan to bring home bottled water or just use water from the tap." The plot moves along the grooves of her depressed, circular thinking, fed by small, ordinary developments: a Knicks game, a Tupperware party, a trip to the grocery store with Teddy, a move to the suburbs. Tranquil as her life is on the outside, her mind never rests, constantly struggling with the voice in her head that she describes as a "skeptical, mocking, bitter person furious she is alive." Memories of childhood with her father intrude often. He called her Flower, but treated her and her mother roughly, leaving many scars. Another frequently heard voice is that of her mother whose motto is "If you look happy and pretty, then you are happy and pretty." Ethan is patient and thoughtful, though he has odd lapses, calling his formerly bulimic wife "Tiny." Koppelman skillfully builds suspense as Julie battles with her demons, conjuring up an airless, oppressively stifling world. Though all signs point to the disturbing ending, it still comes as a surprise.